I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
They have beer where we have blood.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
