I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Randomize
