Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
