two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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