Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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