Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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