You don't have asthma, your pregnant
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
