Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
