Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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