yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
