so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize