oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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