some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I enjoy the company of your penis
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
