so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
