...so i touched it.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
