I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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