Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
