based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
