Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
