He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
