Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
