I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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