Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Randomize
