I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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