you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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