NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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