Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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