you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
