JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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