I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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