Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
