im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
