Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize