In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
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