Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
