This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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