well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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