I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
babies were throwing up all over the place
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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