i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
