im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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