i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
