Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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