just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
it glows. i had to have it.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Randomize
