too bad you live with your parents still
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
