xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
