Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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