Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
