Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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