I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
