It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
